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Google has been useless in answering my question if earwigs bite.

Wikipedia gave me no direct answer. However, they did let me know that earwigs don't really burrow into the brains of humans through the ear and lay their eggs. Thanks, Wikipedia. I was really worried about that.

Some website sources say they don't bite, but they can pinch. Others say they don't pinch, but they do bite. And some other sources say they don't do either but release some liquid from their abdomen that stings you. Sources also vary between their bite/pinch/sting doesn't hurt to it hurts very badly. I would say it hurt pretty bad. Worse than a bee sting.

Also, according to the Internets, they have wings?!? I guess they can fly but they prefer to travel on people and other various objects.

What a mysterious creature.

NOT FUNNY Things Kids Say

The first day we taught the kids class at church we asked the kids what some of their favorite things to do in church were. A few of the kids said Hang Man. Since Hang Man isn't a very Christian or PC game to play, we changed it to Hang Spider. When we'd play, the kids or Jared and I would choose what to hang - we've done black widows, bees, jerusalem crickets, and I think an eye ball.

On Sunday, all the kids ran ahead of us to our classroom. We had to stay behind and help one of the kids who can't walk. As we walked in, the kids were all chanting, "Let's play Hang Obama. Hang Obama. Hang Obama."

Seriously. Not. Funny.

Is it okay for me to talk to all of their parents and give them guilt trips? Their kids are all freakin monsters.

Best vampire movie ever.

Although we never actually got to finish it because NetFlix instant streaming has been so horrible lately and we finally gave up.

Bunny Identity Theft

I am going to re-plant my square-foot garden today after work.

This is the plan:

Also, just now, I was seriously freezing and took my temperature. 95.5! Under 95 according to the Internets is hypothermia. I am going to hop in the bath tub. My body sucks at regulating heat.

funniest dream ever:

So the other night I dreamt that I was somewhere, and I met Anoop from American Idol. In my dream I had a huge crush on him, and I wanted to take him to this big house I was house-sitting at (I think Yanni's house) to impress him. He agreed to go with me so we got in my car (my old red Honda Prelude). While I was driving, I remembered that Jared had just given me the new Blonde Redhead album (which he really did give me in real life the night before). So I put in the CD and put it on track 1 because I remembered that was the song that Jared said was good. I also though this would impress Anoop, but the song as it turned out actually was not that good. A little bit later, Anoop tells me he needs to poop. (haha. i just realized that anoop totally rhymes with poop. funny.) So he tells me he needs to poop, and I ask if its okay if I just pull over and he can go on the side of the road or something. Then he says no, its fine, keep on going. Then I look at his face. And he's totally giving that pooping face. He was totally pooping in my car! I must have given his some weird look, because he then told me "no, it's fine" and showed me his colostomy bag. Then I woke up. haha. best dream ever!